Christmas with the Yuys
by Kitahoshi
Summary: After the series, we get to see the yuys and their celebration of Christmas and New Year's. Just in time for the holidays! R&R!
1. Christmas

(a/n)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
it's suggested that you be familiar with the characters of 'Queen Of Hearts', ' Gundam Wing: Next Generation' , etc. But if you're not....  
  
Heero and Relena are married. They have two children:  
  
Harley Yuy: the older child. Acts like Heero because Heero is his role model. H'e s a very protective older brother , but he secretly likes Niome, Ruth's best friend and isn't very good at showing it. He looks basically like a cuter and smaller version of Heero only with normal, controlled hair.  
  
Ruth Yuy: the cute, younger, impressionable little girl. Although she doesn't take much after either parent, she has limited training under Heero. People tend to be protective of her for some odd reason. Probably because she's adorable. She has golden brown hair, with streaks of dark red- brown. She has hazel eyes and is capable of the yuy glare.  
  
Sally and Wufei are married for some odd reason...? They have one child:  
  
Niome Chang: tough. Has hung out with her father too long and has picked up the saying 'weak men'. Although I have a feeling she got that from Sally. Best friends with Ruth, and very insane and spontaneous but serious at times. Short dark brown curly hair, dark eyes but pale skin due to anemia. Thin. Taller than Ruth, but not Harley.  
  
Duo and Hilde...? Oh well, they have one child:  
  
Megan Maxwell: ... the adult of her family.  
  
Quatre was brainwashed by Dorothy Catalonia for the sole purpose of breeding. Then he was set free. They have one child:  
  
William Winner/Catalonia: ... you know, the cute little blonde boy with dark blue eyes and a messed up childhood. Likes Ruth, which is his downfall. Heero and Harley are a very good team.  
  
Trowa.... lives with Quatre. However, they wanted kids so Catherine offered to be surrogate mother. After this, just don't ask. They have one child, half brother to William:  
  
Craig Barton: ... well, often bossy and over confident. Ruth likes to beat him up. In fact, so does Niome... he's like our new Wufei. Just kidding! Wufei really isn't a sexist pig but this is a comedy!!! Cut me some slack! (Plus this isn't based on the immature and boring fics that are completely about killing Relena. That's really unoriginal. I'm not sacrificing my storyline just to kill Relena. )  
  
(note that Zechs + Noin have a family as well but they're not really in here. They're out somewhere in space)  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Ruth yawned opened her big hazel eyes. She was finally seven! And today was her favourite holiday: Christmas ! It was Christmas Eve and she had made all her gifts and wrapped them herself for her family. Needless to say, even Heero couldn't figure out what was inside under all that wrapping paper and layers of tape.  
  
She sat up, and hopped out of her bed. She blinked, then looked over at a shadowy corner of her room.  
  
"G'morning Daddy," she said, then went to her closet. On both sides were two different types of attire: pink , fluffy dresses and on the other side battle and incognito uniforms to blend in. Needless to say, her parents were very different. Heero sulkily walked out quietly, he liked surprising her because he never did. She had an uncanny sense for it. After scanning the closet for a long time, she spotted a pretty little blue velvet dress that Uncle Quatre and Uncle Trowa had given her for her birthday. She reached , and found that it was too high. Relena had purposely put it beyond reach in the hopes she would give up and take a pink dress. No luck.  
  
"uncle Quatre!" she cried, and Quatre burst in the door. He sighed when he saw she was fine. He had been assigned as her 'bodyguard' , but found himself to be more of a nanny.  
  
"What is it?" he asked the little girl.  
  
"I can't reach..." she said, pointing to the dress. Quatre walked over and took it from the shelf and handed it to her. She took it and walked over to the bed to change. Quatre walked out to check the hallway for anyone who had broken in during the night.  
  
Quatre returned shortly, to zip up the back of the dress. It had become routine by now. He noticed she had done it herself and she looked quite proud of herself. He went back to his post.  
  
Ruth pulled on her shoes hastily, ready to leave her room. She then ran down the hall, making lots of noise and got to the phone. She looked at a number on a piece of paper in her hand and typed it into the vid phone. Sally answered shortly, looking like she had just woken up.  
  
"ONNA! WHO'S CALLING AT 5AM ON MY BREAK?!" yelled Wufei , walking by angrily in a bathrobe.  
  
"Aunty Sally," Ruth said sweetly. Sally blinked and looked again. She really had just woken up.  
  
"Oh, it's Ruth," Sally said over her shoulder.  
  
"Aunty Sally, can Niome come over today?"she asked, catching Sally's attention again.  
  
"Sure. We'll send her over at lunch," Sally said. Ruth sniffled and her eyes went big and shiny.  
  
"But I want her to come over NOW!" she said. Sally yawned. Sally blinked. Sally sold sea shells by the sea shore. Sally then took her earnings and brought Niome over to the Yuy mansion at 7AM. Sally went home and walked back into bed because she was wearing her pyjamas the entire time.  
  
"NIOME!!!!!" Ruth cried, and ran down the stairs and lunged at Niome. Niome moved to the side and Ruth hit a wall. Ruth was about to cry when Niome's eyes widened and she covered Ruth's mouth.  
  
"Shhhhh... you'll wake up everyone else," she hissed. Heero walked by. Relena walked by in a pink robe and pink fluffy slippers from Ardenes. Harley was already in the kitchen. Niome had a sweat drop.  
  
Ruth dragged Niome into the kitchen for breakfast. Another chair was already set out for Niome.  
  
"G'morning mommy!" Ruth said cheerfully. Relena looked at her. Relena squinted, unsure what the fuzzy little bundle of colours was saying. Relena drank her cup of coffee in one gulp. Her vision cleared and she realized it was her daughter.  
  
"You're not wearing pink... " she said quietly. Ruth frowned.  
  
"You're not wearing something that you can fight in," Heero warned. Relena glared at Heero.  
  
"Look at her Heero! How am I supposed to make a public appearance knowing that she doesn't match the car?!" Relena said irritatedly. Heero glared. Relena glared. Niome and Ruth built a time machine, then pressed the 'self- destruct' button and then joined them at the table again.  
  
"You didn't get to the flower garden. Harley blew up the flower garden at your age," Heero said, looking over at Ruth. "It's because you're wearing a dress."  
  
"HEERO! DON'T ENCOURAGE THEM!" Relena said angrily. She then turned sad. "Oh my poor, poor flower garden... " she said, looking out the window.  
  
"Relena, your hair isn't perfect," Heero suddenly said. Relena drank another extra large cup of coffee from Tim Horton's, then looked around and held up a mirror.  
  
"OH MY GOD! WE LOOK LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE! This will not do." Relena said, then pulled out a cell phone and within minutes there were stylists and make up people surrounding everyone at the table. You blink in confusion as the entire kitchen is cloudy from all the cover up and make up being applied. The air clears, and we are left with this average family. Average ANIME family. With perfect hair and faces in the morning.  
  
They then proceeded to eat their cold breakfast. Niome moves her chair nearer to Ruth's, uncomfortable under the intense gaze of the latter's older sibling.  
  
"Here," Heero said, suddenly handing Ruth a gift.  
  
"HEERO! THEY DON'T OPEN THEM UNTIL TOMORROW!" Relena scolded. Heero took back the present.  
  
"How am I supposed to keep track? Your 'joyful holidays' are illogical. Why wouldn't you just give them the gifts on Christmas Eve?" he asked.  
  
"Tradition," she stated coldly, and sipped another coffee.  
  
"Where are those coming from?" you ask, and suddenly the entire cast looks at you. Relena glares.  
  
"WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME WE WERE ON CAMERA! LOOK AT ME, I'M A MESS!" she yelled, stomping off. The rest blink and look at each other.  
  
"Daddy, I don't see anything," Ruth said.  
  
"That's because this is a story. Therefore you can't see the cameras," Harley said.  
  
"Oh, now I get it!" Ruth said, laughing. Harley raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Really?" he asked.  
  
"Not a bit!" she said, then dragged Niome out of the room. Harley looked at Heero. Heero coughed. Harley shuffled.  
  
"I have to go have a secret affair with Duo now for the sake of yaoi fangirls," Heero said before leaving. You suddenly hear an explosion and look to the window to find Relena's flowerbed has exploded.  
  
"I've still got it," Harley says, putting his feet up on the table, and leaning back in the chair. Since this is prohibited in most classrooms, there is reason. Harley's chair breaks from the aforementioned abuse and he falls onto the floor.  
  
"HARLEY!" Relena screams from the stairs. "HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I-" .  
  
"Cameras," Harley called. Relena froze and laughed nervously.  
  
"I mean... peace is much nicer," she said in a calm voice, and the only sign of anger is her eye twitching.  
  
Meanwhile, Ruth is picking flowers in the backyard with Niome to use for a poison Heero expects her to make in the lesson book he made for his children.  
  
"Ruth... are you sure these are the right flowers?" Niome asked, looking at the harmless plants.  
  
"Why? It's not like anyone uses them," Ruth said, picking more flowers.  
  
~~Elsewhere~~  
  
"Bwahahahahahahaha! Now I will Rule! For in your wine I slipped a top secret poison wich will kill you in one minute flat!" a dictator-hopeful was saying to a United Alliance Minister. He waited. And waited. "You're not dying yet, are you?".  
  
"No, I'm afraid I'm not old boy," the minister said. Because we all know that the ministers are always old fashioned.  
  
"DARN THAT YUY! GIVING ME A FAKE POISON!" he yelled before security came and took his arms.  
  
"Good luck next year," the minister said as he was dragged away.  
  
~~The Yuy Mansion~~  
  
"That was strange. We were just in a freeze frame. Where do you suppose the camera went?" Niome asked. Ruth shrugged.  
  
"Oh well. Let's go visit uncle Duo!" Ruth said, and took out a switch. She pressed a large, circular , red button. The ground beneath them opened up and they were sucked through pipes, tubes, pools, black holes , McDonald's and landed in a large cartoon laboratory. A redhaired boy looked at them increduously.  
  
"What are you dooing in my secret laboratory?!" Dexter yelled at the well drawn children.  
  
"Oh, sorry Dexter, we're just looking. I don't want to buy anything." Ruth said, pulling Niome along into a rocket wich landed in front of the house next to the Yuy mansion.  
  
"Why are we back here?" Niome asked.  
  
"This is it. This is where uncle Duo lives?! WHY DID WE TAKE A ROCKET?!" Niome yelled. Ruth laughed.  
  
"It was fun, wasn't it?" she said, then strolled down the path to the door with Niome in tow.  
  
"Do you ALWAYS take that way?!" Niome asked. Ruth raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Yes," she said.  
  
"Why not just walk here?" Niome asked in an exasperated voice. Ruth looked shocked.  
  
"Wow... you're really smart. I never thought of just walking down the sidewalk... " she said, thinking. Niome fell anime style, and got up as Ruth opened the door to the Maxwell house. Hilde and Megan were sitting in front of a campfire in the living room, neud.  
  
"AAAAAHHHHH!" Niome screamed, and hid behind Ruth.  
  
"Oh, hi guys! We decided on having neud marshmallows for breakfast but Duo had to go have a secret affair with Ruth's daddy so he missed it," Megan said.  
  
"But it's not secret if everyone knows about it!" Niome protested. The cast was silent and looked at you. You slowly move away, their eyes following. You scream and run and jump out the window. You go to the hospital and can't come back until Christmas morning.  
  
~~Christmas Morning~~  
  
Ruth opened her gift from Relena. A pink dress. Ruth opens her gift from Heero. A gun.  
  
"Heero!" Relena protested.  
  
"But you told me to MAKE something. I made the blue prints for that gun and Dr. J made it." Heero said.  
  
"But Dr. J has been dead for ten years... " Relena said, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"That's what YOU think." Heero stated simply. You look back over at Ruth for storyline purposes. Ruth opens her gift from Niome. A red chinese dress. Ruth puts it on right there. Heero blows up the papparazi. Ruth opens her gift from Harley. A self destruct button. Ruth presses it. Relena's freshly reassembled flowerbed blows up. Ruth opens her gift from everyone else, but we focus in on Niome.  
  
Niome opens her gift from Sally. A preventer doll. She pulls off the head and throws it over her shoulder. Niome opens her gift from Heero. A gun. Niome shoots the preventer doll for target practice. Niome shoots a couple of paparzi. Niome shoots some left over people with cameras. Niome opens her gift from Harley. A red box. Inside the red box is someone's heart. Still beating. Niome screams and drops the box before running out the doors to the Yuy mansion.  
  
Everyone else stands up and faces you. They all smile and a fuzzy pink heart surrounds them in a sappy TV effect as they all smile with rosy cheeks.  
  
"Merry Christmas!"  
  
(a/n) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
*Ardene's is a store with fuzzy girly things.  
  
*McDonald's speaks for itself  
  
*Tim Horton's , if you DON'T know, they sell coffee and get lots of money from canadians for it  
  
*Dexter's lab, tv show seen on cartoon network , etc.  
  
*preventer doll, making fun of barbie is fun.  
  
DISCLAIMER: I own almost nothing... NO SUE! *runs from mob of lawyers with Ruth slung over her shoulder* 


	2. New Year's Eve

(a/n)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
After encouragement from my only reviewer Zan67, and the idea of add-on by Niome-Chan and her hockey stick threats I have come to create this! *holds up burnt cake* ... o_0 oops. Anyway, I also wrote this! *holds up her newest poem* Wha? WHERE'S MY NEW CHAPTER?! Oh wait... *thinks* I still have to write it, don't I? (Since I have written the author's notes up here , then I haven't written the new chapter until after this.) Oh yes, and sorry for any confusion when the name 'Audrey' appeared in the last chapter. I have fixed and reloaded it , so there's no need to panic... *everyone runs around like a bomb is about to go off* ... -_-;; um.. just review, okay?  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Ruth opened her bright hazel eyes, rubbed them then rolled over and went back to sleep. Today wasn't her favourite holiday, and she liked to sleep in.  
  
"Ruth, wake up," said a voice. She yawned and looked up. It was her nanny.  
  
"G'morning Uncle Quatre," she said, then rolled over again.  
  
"Ruth, it's almost lunch... " Quatre said, sweatdropping. She blinked.  
  
"Okay. " she said, then pulled the blankets over her head. Quatre sighed. It was time to bring in the big guns. After doing so, and Ruth started snoring, he sighed and put them back in their special case labelled: 'The big guns'. He then kneeled at the side of the bed and decided to use the secret weapon and fool proof plan.  
  
"Ruth... Niome wants to see you... " he said quietly. "But I'll just go tell her you're asleep.. ". Quatre wasn't sure at first but identified the flying object moving around the room at high speed as Ruth.  
  
"NIOME!NIOME!NIOME!NIOME!NIOME!" she eventually reached the door where Quatre blocked it.  
  
"Get dressed first," he commanded softly. And no one can resist Quatre. Well, no one but Frodo Baggins(LOTR), but that's a different story. The blurry moving speed demon moved to the closet and emerged wearing a mix of Heero's side and Relena's side. A pink, frilly shirt and spandex shorts. Needless to say, she looked adorable. Quatre examined the outfit for a moment, before deciding.  
  
"What is it?" she asked, blinking.  
  
"You need to change your hair. Do you want it like Heero's or Relena's?" he asked, taking out a cell phone to call his stylist. She blinked.  
  
"Er... neither. I actually have an idea though... " she said shyly. He moved in.  
  
"What? Tell uncle Quatre," he said, crouching beside her. She whispered in his ear. He raised an eyebrow, then nodded affirmatively. "Ruth, why did you whisper it?".  
  
"Ever since Christmas, I'm afraid there are still cameras that the reader left behind. Since you can't see them, you never know." Ruth replied. Quatre laughed.  
  
"Silly little one, those don't exist! Or else there would be cameras... in ... my ... bedroom ... " Quatre began to turn red. "TROWA!!!". He suddenly ran off, to warn Trowa.  
  
Ruth blinked. Ruth shrugged. Ruth pulled a cell phone from the baggy pink shirt and called her own stylist.  
  
"NIOME!" she called, running down the stairs. She spotted a shape moving around and instantly glomped it. "Niome, I missed you sooo much!" .  
  
"Errr... your highness... I'm not Niome... " said the little blonde arabian boy. Ruth blinked and got off him to check.  
  
"Niome! Dress up is fun! Wow, that mask looks so real," Ruth said poking the boy's cheek. Dorothy walked in.  
  
"There you are, William! How many times do I have to tell you not to get lost in this place? There's a psycho proclaiming peace around every corner!" Dorothy said, then noticed Ruth. "... who are you, kid? A stow away?". Ruth blinked.  
  
"No... I've never been on a ship before," she said. Dorothy sighed.  
  
"It was just an expression. By the looks of you... you're Relena's secret clone with your hair dyed brown and hazel contact lenses," Dorothy said, examining the little girl.  
  
"But... " Ruth tried to interrupt but realized the older woman wasn't listening.  
  
"No, no. YOU'RE HERE TO ASSASSINATE RELENA WITH YOUR ADORABLE LITTLE FACE!" Dorothy said, picking up Ruth and trying to take the mask off. It came off, but Dorothy was surprised to see the little girl looked exactly the same.  
  
"UNCLE QUATRE!" She yelled.  
  
"And so maybe yaoi fangirls out there have been.... hold on, I'm being called." Quatre said, stopping his explanation to Trowa about the cameras. Using his ultrasensitive hearing for Ruth's location , he discovered she was in the next room. He broke down the door and pointed the gun at the tall woman holding the little girl. Dorothy. "Dorothy, put the girl down."  
  
"Never! I will save Relena from this evil doll!" Dorothy said, holding up the very upset Ruth. "Unguard!". For a random plot twist we zoom in on an epic fencing battle between Dorothy and Quatre with Ruth tied up on a red velvet chair as the prize. The little arabian boy is dressed in a guard's uniform and keeps Ruth from escaping.  
  
"Why are you gonna kill Relena?" he suddenly asked. She sniffled, because she can't talk through the gag.  
  
"Hime mot. Hime her mmotter!" she exclaimed through the gag. He realized it was no use and ungagged her.  
  
"What did you say?" he asked. She blinked once, then took in a large breath.  
  
"DADDY!!!!" she yelled extremely loudly. Heero casually walked past the epic battle and glared at the little boy.  
  
"WHO is responsible for tieing up my DAUGHTER?" he growled menacingly. Will's eyes widened.  
  
"Oops...? ... MOMMA!" he yelled for dear life as Heero held up the child like a disobedient puppy. Dorothy's mother senses kicked in and she fled the epic battle with Quatre to see her son being held up by Heero Yuy.  
  
"HEERO! PUT MY SON DOWN!" she yelled angrily. The power of her extremely bad eyebrows was enough to faze him for a moment. He scowled and dropped the boy.  
  
"Dorothy... I should have known you would be behind this. I know you're a big fan of Relena's but you didn't have to kidnap our daughter," he said, crossing his arms. Dorothy's eyes were as wide as saucers.  
  
"Oh. She's... your daughter? BUT I THOUGHT YOU ONLY HAD A SON!" she said.  
  
"DOES SHE LOOK LIKE A BOY TO YOU?!" he replied.  
  
"NO! SHE BETTER NOT MAKE MY BOY SOFT!" she yelled.  
  
"WELL HE BETTER NOT INFLUENCE HER INTO THAT SPACE CRAZY STUFF!" Heero spat venemously. Dorothy stopped and looked at the empty chair.  
  
"Uuuhh... Heero? Where are our children?" she asked.  
  
~~elsewhere~~  
  
"Hey! Let's play this game, okay? In 'ped hunt' you get to hit people for points!" Ruth said enthusiastically, taking out 'Road Rage' for N64 from the museum's case without setting off the alarm.  
  
"I don't know... wouldn't you rather enjoy that one?" Will said, pointing to the interactive Pikachu game. Ruth frowned.  
  
"You're no fun," she said, but dragged him along anyway.  
  
~~at the Yuy Mansion~~  
  
"Look what your boy has done!" Heero said angrily, pointing at the television. The reporter was standing in front of a museum.  
  
"I'm standing here in front of the most well guarded museum for old technology. It appears someone broke in and has left no trace. All we know is that the culprit or culprits took an N64 gaming system and Roadrash, a popular game from the 90's. " the reporter went on, however Heero turned off the television.  
  
"I'm... so ... proud," Dorothy said, nearly in tears.  
  
"You realize most of the work was probably done by my well trained daughter, right?" he asked. "He only picked out the game,".  
  
"Shut up. I'm sure he was an equally good part of the team!" Dorothy protested.  
  
"Yeah. The one that set off the alarm!" he said.  
  
~~elsewhere~~  
  
"There you are Ruth... who's that?" Quatre asked, pointing. The two children were playing video games in Ruth's play room no.7.  
  
"I don't know. I found him," she replied.  
  
"Do you know where my momma is?" Will suddenly asked.  
  
"WHERE did you find him?" Quatre said.  
  
"... I don't remember... " Ruth said, pausing to think.  
  
"What's your mother's name?" Quatre asked. Will stared at him blankly for a few moments.  
  
"Momma?"he said questioningly.  
  
"You sure look like uncle Quatre," Ruth said.  
  
"I wonder whose child you could be... ? Do YOU know?" Quatre said, suddenly turning on you. Once more you feel the cold chill run down your back when you have been spotted by the anime characters. They look at you expectantly. You decide not to jump so hastily out the window and take out an escape rope you found in Pokemon Silver, and escape the Yuy mansion.  
  
You take the day off to buy Baskin Robin's ice cream, and realize it's New Year's Eve. Having nothing better to do, you head back to the Yuy mansion where everyone is siting merrily around the fireplace. Dorothy is singing Christmas Carols offkey, so you cover your ears until Relena politely gets Dorothy to stop.  
  
Dorothy stands, and begins singing the serenading song she wrote for Relena after these long nine years apart, then Heero gags her and ties her to a chair while clenching an advil bottle. You sigh in relief.  
  
The outer part of the screen becomes fuzzy as loved ones huddle together, Heero glares at Will, sending the famous father signal of 'don't even think about it or I will kill you'. And they count down the New Year.  
  
5... 4... 3... 2... 1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
They all look at you and smile.... except Wufei who is drunk and Relena who is running like a coffee freak while Trowa practices his tightrope in the middle of the living room and Niome looks afraid as Harley walks up to her.  
  
"Happy New Year." he said blandly. Niome shivers and tries to step back.  
  
"H-happy New Year Harley... " she said, wanting to run but found she was chained to the couch by Ruth who wanted to watch the romantic scene.  
  
"I will kill you," he said, holding up a gun. Niome screamed, broke the chains and ran home as the rest of the gang joined together for an "awwwwwwwwww" moment. Ruth is nearly in tears.  
  
"It's his first time telling someone he'll kill them.... they grow up so fast!" Ruth said, sniffling. "I hope Niome knows that now she's got to show her feelings by following him across the world." Heero and Duo sit together in a suggestive pose just for the fangirls peering in from the window. They all look at you and smile as they say it together:  
  
"HAPPY NEW YEAR'S FROM THE GUNDAM WING GANG!". (Well, except for Wufei who has passed out on the floor holding an empty bottle of vodka)  
  
(a/n)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
...hmmmmm .... my crazy overaffectionate cat is clawing my back and is perched on my shoulder at the current moment so I can't think much beyond "OWWW!"  
  
Alright... *escape rope is used in the pokemon games to escape from an evil person's lair or a cave, etc.  
  
*Road Rage , I don't know if that's the right name, is a video game where you ride a motorcycle and on 'ped hunt' you are given points for running over pedestrians.  
  
*Interactive pikachu game is that game with the microphone and all you do is talk to Pikachu. It's one of those 'cute' games. I haven't played it myself but I've read about it. I have played road rage though.  
  
*Baskin Robin's is the best place in the world to get ice cream! Haha, and /you/ would know, wouldn't you? 


End file.
